From Single Dude to Single Dad. A #QuickChat with Will Carr
I recently had a chance to sit down with Will Carr, a Single Dad and entrepreneur. In our #QuickChat, we spoke about his motivation behind running his own business and how his lifestyle centers around Blakely, his 2- year old daughter. In our candid talk, we discuss the daunting court process and co-parenting. While it […]
Blended and Black TV is HERE! Episode 1: Spilling Tea
For the 1st episode of B&B TV, I’ve partnered with CelebrityXO to bring you a Pop Culture edition of Blended and Black TV! I’m so excited about this collaboration because I get to mesh my favorite topic, Blended Families with one of my other favorite things to chat about: TEA! This week we’re discussing Megan Markle’s […]
What is the Golden Uterus Complex and Are YOU a victim?
Most mothers reflect fondly upon the day their children were born as one that tested her strength, her faith, her pain tolerance and her undying love for a child she’d never met. The birth bond is so strong that every mother could probably recount everything leading up to the moment her child was born. When […]
Former Playboy Model Commits Murder/Suicide with 7-year-old Son Amidst Messy Custody Battle
Former Playboy model commits murder/suicide with 7- year son with amidst messy custody battle. Thursday evening May 17, 2018 Stephanie Adams checked into the penthouse suite at the Gotham Hotel. At approximately 8:15 Friday morning, the former November 1992 Playboy centerfold gazed at the bustling streets of New York City. These would be the final moments of she and […]
Why I Am Raising Tech-Free Kids
Kids love everything shiny and new… or wait. Is that adults? Either way, kids do not have that little voice that says, “That’s enough. Time to do something else.” All they have is a “go” switch. As adults and especially as parents, it is our job to turn that focus onto constructive things. Technology has […]
Stepparents: 7 Questions to Ask When You are Feeling Terribly Alone
There is no typical day in my Coaching practice. Some days I may be sitting with a 10-year-old that is unable to accept her parents’ divorce. Other days, I am sitting with a grandmother who is unwilling to acknowledge her sons new wife’s children (her step-grandchildren). One of the core principles of Blended and Black […]
How To Find Your Lane: Second Wives and Stepmoms
As second wives, it’s not uncommon to feel the brunt of the grief from the breakdown of your Husband’s first family. The children may still be unable to accept their parents’ separation, the ex-wife may still be full of resent and the father may have a lot of guilt because he is now displaced from […]
Our 1st Group Therapy session was actually good!
Last night’s facebook live Group Therapy episode was actually pretty good for our 1st run. There were a few glitches and tech difficulties, but the content is SO strong, I decided to share. FFWD about 1:30 and enjoy 45 minutes of Group Therapy. We will be doing another session next month. Stay tuned for updates. […]
Beating the Bitter Ex at Her Own Game
There is an inherent toxicity that occurs in the Stepmother/Biological mother dynamic. Just like cats and dogs are natural-born enemies, it is almost expected that a SM and BM will have a relationship built on contempt and competition. The fact of the matter is, when women work together for the betterment of the children that […]
PRESS RELEASE: Naja Hall Talks High Conflict Co-Parenting and Her Qwn “Girl,Bye!” Moments
Blended and Black founder, Naja Hall spoke with AskSharifah on Sharifah Hardie’s long-running LA talk radio show. The ladies had a full 1 hour session on-air and it was full of so many sistafriend moments. They spoke about Naja’s experiences as a Family Life Coach and some best practices in dealing with high-conflict personalities, mental illness, […]
The Advantage of Dating a Daddy: A Look into Modern Fatherhood and How it Affects Mothers
I remember being 22 and pregnant with my first daughter. The bold question from my uncle, “Are you prepared to take care of this child by yourself?” continues to resonate to this very day. I assumed he was just being yet another pessimistic, overprotective male family member; yet I had no clue this thought-provoking question […]
10 Questions to Ask BEFORE You Fall in Love
When we are falling in love, we tend to overlook some key factors that will ultimately determine the success or failure of our relationship. In the beginning of a relationship, we are often blinded by lust, fantasy and hope. The definition stage of a relationship usually lasts from 6 months to a year. During this […]
25 Factors That Determine the Type of Relationship You Will Have With Your Stepkids
I pulled this excerpt from a paper written by Dr. Linda Neilsen. This is another one of the pieces I wish I had when I began my Stepmom journey. I would encourage SM and BMs to read it….carefully. -Naja Below are the situational factors which will determine what kind of relationship you have with your […]
A Personal Story: How My Parents Divorce Wrecked My Childhood
By Blended and Black member Stephanie Martinez From the time I was a little girl until I was in my early twenties, I felt forgotten. I felt unimportant. I felt like I didn’t matter. I am a product of two divorces, abuse, and abandonment. Co-parenting was not a thing in our life. Everything was a […]
Texas Father To Be Executed For Killing Daughters While Mother Listened
HUNTSVILLE, Texas — As her mother listened on the telephone, 9-year-old Faith Battaglia pleaded with her father. “No, Daddy, please don’t, don’t do it!” the child begged. Mary Jane Pearle yelled into the phone for Faith and her 6-year-old sister, Liberty, to run. Then Pearle heard gunshots. On Thursday, her ex-husband, John David Battaglia, is […]
The Disengaged Stepmom: 4 Ways to Step BACK from the pain & hurt of Step parenting
dis·en·gage (dsn-gj) v. dis·en·gaged, dis·en·gag·ing, dis·en·gag·es 1. To release from something that holds fast, connects, or entangles. 2. To release (oneself) from an engagement, pledge, or obligation. To free or detach oneself; withdraw. “Disengage from the situation!” “Just disengage from your stepchild if they are causing you pain!” “I would just disengage from my husband if he was acting like that.” These […]
Khloe Kardashian is Preggo BUT…..
There has been much speculation about the youngest Kardashian sister’s, 33, growing belly lately. Some call her 1st pregnancy announcement, the worst kept secret in Hollywood. But she finally made her mom-to be status known via her Instagram account yesterday. Kardashian and Cleveland Cavalier player, Tristan Thompson, 26, are set to become parents in early 2018. […]
I Wrote a Book & I’m Having a Party. You’re INVITED!!!
*Update The Mixer was a total success! Check out the fun trailer from the evening and a few images from the evening! If you’re in Memphis, TN on December 27th at 7pm, join me for a fun evening of enlightenment, conversation and a slight turn up! I’ll be doing a soft launch […]
THINK PIECE: A Love Note for the Hater in Your Life
At some point in life, you are going to experience unrequited hatred. It can come from an overlooked co-worker, an angry co-parent and even pure strangers. While I do not pretend to be the picture of innocence, I have faced some visceral that I just did not deserve! In the past, I would internalize the […]
6 Ways to Spot a Narcissistic Mother
In our community, I notice that a lot of us are overly emotional but we lack the depth to properly express our feelings. People are increasingly seeming more angry and confused. There are so many walking around with undiagnosed mental illnesses and the majority of our issues began taking root during our childhoods. Our […]
Child Spankings: You See Abuse, I See Discipline! It’s All About Perspective!
Child discipline is a big topic in the Blended and Black facebook group. Last week, the following video was shared in the group and an intense discussion ensued. While some are adamantly against spankings, some parents do acknowledge the positive effects corporal punishment can have on a child. While we often debate, it’s rare that a […]
Jesse Williams to Pay Estranged Wife $160K in Support
Let’s go to the Bank Jesse Williams is opening his wallet wide for his estranged wife, to the tune of $160,000. Jesse’s estranged wife, Aryn Drake-Lee, just filed legal docs which disclose a temporary settlement, in which Jesse agrees to give her $100k for spousal and child support and $60k to cover her lawyer’s fees and other […]
Announcement! I’m a Family Life Coach!
I couldn’t hold this in any longer! After 1000s of required hours, months of rigorous study and a killer exam, I’m so happy to announce that I am a Family Life Coach. I earned my Bachelors in Family and Consumer Sciences (a long time ago) so obtaining this license was a natural progression in my […]
SPOTLIGHT: Single Dad teaches other Dads to do their daughters’ natural hair
The most frightening words a Father can hear from his daughter are, “Daddy, can you do my hair?” Darious Bland, a Single Dad and a valuable member of the Blended and Black community, recently sat down with me to share his journey to becoming a Daddy Hair Guru! Darious has been featured in Huffington Post, […]
Stepmom Support: Please Don’t Tell Me I CHOSE THIS LIFE
Like most women that are falling in love, I was hopeful and anxious when my Future Husband and I began dating. He is an astonishing man! He’s tall, dark and very handsome. He is kind and gentle. He has rock hard abs! He is also a Father. The latter was a tough fact for me […]
We’ve Been Nominated For Our 1st Blogger Award!
I’m so excited to share that Blended & Black has been nominated for The Sunshine Blogger Award by KandyAppleMama! The Sunshine Blogger Award is given from bloggers to other bloggers who are creative, positive and inspiring. Once nominated, the blogger is required to write a post where they: Thank the blogger who nominated them and link […]
Use These Apps to Communicate With Your Co-Parent
BEST APPS FOR CO-PARENTING When it comes to divorce, technology often gets a bad rap. Many people cite phone addictions and their partners social media usage as contributing factors to their relationship breakdown. Yet not all technology is bad. These co-parenting apps show just how beneficial tech can be. Divorce is hard enough – let your phone […]
Sis, Are you pushing your child’s father away?
Sis, May I have a word with you for a second? There are far too many good men who are fighting to be involved in the life of a child they created only to be constantly turned away by a bio-mom. There is also a statistic of women who are fighting to have their child’s […]
Newlywed Murders Husband For Insurance Money. Finds Out Ex-Wife is Still Listed as Beneficiary
Mrs. Uloma Curry-Walker has been found guilty of aggravated murder, conspiracy, felonious assault and other charges in the Nov. 3, 2013 slaying of her then-husband of four months, William Walker. The wife of the Cleveland firefighter was convicted Friday of soliciting his death to collect on insurance money. Little did she know, her husband had […]
Why Having Expectations of Your Co-Parent May Leave You Disappointed
Hypothetically speaking, if your co-parent approached you and gave you their most honest reason explaining why they are high-conflict, inconsistent, or not involved -would you listen and accept their response? Would you offer solutions to help ease them back into your child’s life? Would you berate them and spew insults? I recently posed this question […]
Give Your ANGRY ‘BabyMama’ a Pass. She Just Needs a Nap.
What if I told you that all Babymamas are not evil ? While she may be perceived as bitter, angry or spiteful, she really doesn’t mean to be. Now hear me out! I grew up with a Southern Granny and she had a favorite saying, “pay that no mind”? My Grandmother was trying to communicate […]
Studies Show Little Black Girls are Viewed as Less Innocent Than White Peers
I’ve always felt that Black women are the footstools of America. Both figuratively and literally, it was on the backs of the Black woman that this country has prospered. We have bred children like cattle to be ripped from our womb’s and sold off to the highest bidder, our breast milk has sustained Massa’s (Slave […]
Why Men Marry Some Women and Not Others
Why Men Marry Some Women And Not Others was written by John T. Molloy , the author of “Dress for Success”. This book is based on over 3,000 interviews conducted by Molloy and his researchers. They interviewed couples coming out of marriage license bureaus! They basically bum rushed these people for information. I recall how excited, anxious, nervous my Husband and I were […]
Are You Grooming Your Little Girl To Be a Future Divorcee?
I recently read an article written by a woman that admittedly has Daddy issues. She was very open about her struggles with maintaining healthy relationships because of her deeply embedded fear of abandonment. Her lack of trust for her father had resonated throughout many of her interpersonal relationships. Like many people raised by a Single […]
ASK NAJA: My Son’s Expensive Toys Always Get Broken at Dad’s House
Dear Naja, I’m pretty new to this group and I don’t know the lingo for exes, wives, etc. so forgive me in advance. Anyhow, never married and one son (6), sons father has 2 other boys from a current marriage. My son wants to pretty much take everything (well not everything- see below) from my […]
ASK NAJA: BioMom Won’t Stop Calling During Our Visitation. Help!
Dear Naja, My husband asked me to post this because he’s at a loss for what to do. He has 50/50 joint physical and legal custody of the kids. In addition, in the court order he requested it be written in that we have two uninterrupted weeks during the summer with the kids because BM […]
Can We STOP Recreating the Definitions of What Makes a Single Parent?
Stepping on my pink soapbox……. Your personal presumptions on a topic, do not make it the gospel. As much as we would like others to see with the same sainthood as Mary of Magdalene, many Single mothers are not afforded that grace. There’s no need to recreate the definition of single parent and redraw the […]
OG Marriage Advice From My Mom
Happy 40th Anniversary to my parents, Nate and Nancy! I asked my Mom how she kept her marriage spicy for 40 years. She told me the normal cliches like, never go to bed angry and keep God 1st. But then She said some real insider info! 1. Be Creative She explained that there were many […]
Heal Yourself With Forgiveness
All stress, regardless of the source, will undermine our well-being if left unchecked. The accumulated stress can eventually lead to conditions such as anxiety, insomnia, high blood pressure, heart disease, cancer, stroke, ME/chronic fatigue and depression, to name but a few. So, any steps we can take to reduce our stress will be beneficial. What […]
Sunday Inspiration: Hate Eats Away at Your Happiness
Life is so short. In the blink of an eye, our time here could end. Spending your days raising hell, filled with rage and carrying hatred shortens your good days. Only a COWARD holds on to hatred. You see, love can hurt, it can make you vulnerable. It can expose you for who you are […]
Interfering With Your Child’s Relationship With Their Other Parent
I know a few parents that have #Alientated their kids against their coparent. Some have been unintentional occurrences of making back biting comments or expressing unnecessary feelings in front of the child. Others are more overt, like blocking phone calls, making demands beyond court orders, telling the kids their parent does not love them etc. […]
PODCAST: I Just Don’t Like My Dad’s New Wife
Story Time: I just don’t like my Dad’s new Wife Listen to the latest Podcast NOW on Youtube! Backstory Blended and Black member, Shell’s parents divorced when she was 12. She went from feeling like the apple of her father’s eye to being stunned when he married her Stepmom 2 years after her parent’s divorce. […]
Drama: Woman runs over her baby daddy’s Girlfriend with her car
In an all around tragedy, an 18-year-old woman is dead after being repeatedly run over and rammed into a tree by her boyfriend’s child’s mother. Tatyanna Lewis, 18, was killed by a 24-year-old woman Friday night (May 12) in Chicago just after 11 p.m. The attacker — whose name has not been released — rammed Lewis […]
